The highest and most beautiful things in life are not to be heard about, nor read about, nor seen but, if one will, are to be lived. ~Soren Kierkegaar

When I read this, it's almost as if the words jumped off of the page and slapped me in the face, or as if they were written just for me.

We can't just hear about the most beautiful things, or read them, or see them, because were meant to live them.

Figuring out that life is the beautiful thing. The friendships,the laughter, and passion for every person and relationship within that life, is what makes it beautiful.

Within the last year of my life, I have learned how to live. I've learned how beautiful my life is and realized, and become able to vocalize, that I'm in love with it. I've learned how connected I can be with my creator and the people around me, and how important that is to me. I have learned that the most beautiful things in my life are the things that I'm living, everyday, the conversations that I'm having, the hands that I'm holding, the smiles that I'm giving. And not only all of those things that I am giving, but also the things that I am receiving because of that release, or that giving.

Throughout my upper teen years I asked myself, often; What was I created to do? and now I know that there is only one phrase that can completely define it, and that is to just "live the beauty." Live the beauty that God has created my life to be. Accept it. Believe in it. And know that it's beautiful.

"Live the Beauty"

~Living the beauty means to embrace every moment of life with a current running through your soul that makes you know that that moment is meant to be there.
~Living the beauty means to embrace every relationship within your life and know that there is purpose within it.
~Living the beauty means to know who you are, that you're valued, and that no event, disappointment, hurt, or pain, can truly alter the essence of that value, or that beauty.
~Living the beauty is a choice to look at the world, and know that it wouldn't be the same without you in it, and that because of that realization, you can do what God purposed you to do.



I have no Idea where this came from, or why I wrote any of it, but that current tells me that I'll use it for something.

The End.

My favorite Christmas Hymn

O Holy Night! The stars are brightly shining,
It is the night of the dear Saviour's birth.
Long lay the world in sin and error pining.
Till He appeared and the Spirit felt its worth.
A thrill of hope the weary world rejoices,
For yonder breaks a new and glorious morn.
Fall on your knees! Oh, hear the angel voices!
O night divine, the night when Christ was born;
O night, O Holy Night , O night divine!
O night, O Holy Night , O night divine!

Led by the light of faith serenely beaming,
With glowing hearts by His cradle we stand.
O'er the world a star is sweetly gleaming,
Now come the wisemen from out of the Orient land.
The King of kings lay thus lowly manger;
In all our trials born to be our friends.
He knows our need, our weakness is no stranger,
Behold your King! Before him lowly bend!
Behold your King! Before him lowly bend!

Truly He taught us to love one another,
His law is love and His gospel is peace.
Chains he shall break, for the slave is our brother.
And in his name all oppression shall cease.
Sweet hymns of joy in grateful chorus raise we,
With all our hearts we praise His holy name.
Christ is the Lord! Then ever, ever praise we,
His power and glory ever more proclaim!
His power and glory ever more proclaim!



Why?
Because I can feel Jesus when I listen to it.

My favorite line is "Truly He taught us to love one another"
It makes it all so real to me, to think that God created the truest representation of love, wrapped it in human form, and sent it to earth as a baby boy. The birth of Christ was God's gift of true, pure, love, and I beleive was God's way of setting the biggest example he could have ever set. Surely he has taught us to love one another.

Christmas should be a celebration of that love for this world.

I enjoy Christmas. I love the way it makes me feel, but I sometimes fail to realize that this gift is meant to be celebrated all year long, and the best way I can celebrate it, is by loving every person that walks into my life with that same love that Mary birthed into this world.

So why does Christmas make us feel this way? because it represents LOVE in it's purest form.

Just my theory :)

“Music speaks what cannot be expressed, soothes the mind and gives it rest, heals the heart and makes it whole, flows from heaven to the soul.”

I close my eyes and in the silence
Hear a voice so clear
Reminding me your love
Is always right here

Within me-then all of my doubts disappear
And there's nothing to fear- your love is
Within me
You gave me strength to believe
That all that I am and all that I'll ever need is
Within me

When my spirit's all but broken
I'm humbled to the bone
Searching for the grace
To find my way home

I take a breath, a slow deep breath
And feel a sense of calm
Then the hurt in my heart is suddenly gone

Within me you wiped away all my tears
There's nothing to fear- your love's within me
It gives me the strength to believe
That all that I am and all that I'll ever need is
Within me

Songwriters: Martillano, Rose; Sillas, Phillip H; Rich, Allan


I find strength in lyrics. I find peace in music, and it is most definitely my lifelong security blanket.

The times that he's the closest

The times that I can feel my grandfather the closest are in my times of pure worship, and this makes perfect sense because my grandfather was a worshiper, in spirit and in truth.

His whole life was a reflection of God's beauty and he could find moments of worship hidden amongst all sorts of times. I can remember many times riding somewhere with him and listening to him pray and feel the very presence of God fill the car that we were riding in. I have never been able to explain it, and I've stopped trying, but there was something about that man's worship that ushered the very presence of God into a room, or a car, or on vacation,or at a band concert or at graduation.......just about anywhere.

One of my most vivid and cherished last moments of him, are ones of worship.

As he lay in that hospital bed in their living room he had become pretty non responsive to anything that was going on around him, but we still talked to him and sang to him. We played his Gaither Vocal Band tapes for him, because he loved it. The night before he died we played one for him and he began to sing along with it, only for a moment, and not in tune, but that moment was one that I will never, ever, forget.

This man, cancer has destroyed his earthly body and he has every reason to be angry, to be sad, to hurt, but all he can do is worship.

Through his last moments of life, he worshiped, because he understood that what he had lived his whole life for, was about to occur. He was about to meet his purest love, and he was ready.


I am sad, and I do hurt, but deep, way deep down inside, I know that he hears, he sees, and I can feel his spirit so strong in those moments of worship, and I thank God for this comfort that he has given me. I praise my creator for giving me strength.


These lyrics grab me:
Old man, hospital bed
The room is filled with people he loves
And he whispers
"Don't cry for me, I'll see you all someday"
He looks up and says
"I can see God's face"

This is my temporary home, it's not where I belong
Windows and rooms that I'm passing through
This was just a stop on the way to where I'm going
I'm not afraid because I know
This was my temporary home

The voice that's missing

I miss my grandfather so much.

I wish I could tell him about all of the wonderful things that are happening in my life and how what he always told me, "you can do it gal," is really the truth.

I wish I could see his proud face, just for a moment, and hear his calming voice speaking words of life into the world.

I wish I could hear him say the prayer over our food at Thanksgiving, but most of all I wish I could just talk to him.

I just need five minutes to tell him about what is going on around here and to ask him a couple of these "life decision" questions.

Friday, at 6:50 am, marks three years that I have spent without this voice in my life, and while I know that he is no longer suffering, or battling, I'm still sad and it still hurts.

Why does it feel like I'm always forgetting to hug someone, or call someone? Why does it always feel like someone has left me out on my birthday? Why at the moment that I feel the most successful, do I realize that one of the most important people, I can't tell, I can't see smile. Why does it always feel like someone is missing?

Love Applied

God's voice has become so evident in my life recently. I can hear him in the tiniest of things and feel his presence in the darkest of situations. I don't think that voice ever went anywhere, it's right here inside of me, but I do think my sense of hearing has been a little off.

I love how at the moment that I feel the absolute weakest, I feel the very hand of God upon my shoulder.
"When I feel like I can't go on, you deliver me"

I love how no matter what the question is in my life, I can answer it with the love of God.

I love how there are so many amazing people in my life that are major reminders of God's divine power.

I love waking up everyday knowing that I have a purpose, and that purpose is to love every single person in my life- to show them the love that God has for them.

I think our generation, our culture, is crying out to be shown, SHOWN the love of Christ. I think people are tired of empty words, of being told bible stories by people that have no conviction about what they're saying. People are thirsting for genuine. They want to know that what we have tapped into is real and that we apply it in our lives- that it's truly our conviction.
Our witness is the very love of God emanating from our presence, our mouths don't do it justice.

I love my God.

"The Great Kapok Tree"

I read this book to my students for the first time yesterday and I knew that they were ready for it and would give me some good thoughts, but one student really surprised me.

"Senhor, when you awake, please look upon us all with new eyes"

My question: "Does that mean that the boy wanted the man to literally get new eyeballs to look at things?"

Very shy little girl: "No. It means that he wants him to see the world differently, through the eyes of beauty and love."

I was floored, and she said it so well. I'm pretty sure that I stood there with my mouth hanging open for at least 20 seconds. My host teacher and I locked eyes at about the same time and I could see that she was just as pleased as I was. :)

I am learning so much from these people that only have 7 or 8 years of experience with life.

My God, if we could all look at things through the eyes of "beauty and love," the way that I truly believe children do, there is no telling what mountains humans could move.

Anything, but ordinary :)