Growing Pains

School is a little crazy right now........I've yet to grasp what my unit will be about for my full time teaching, and I'm beginning to become a little concerned...............

I know my students well, and I know what I would like to do, but I feel resistance and I don't like it.

An important individual within this process put it to me pretty straight today, stung a little, but she told me to "get a backbone"........which I already have, but decided a little earlier in the school year that it might be OK to hide a little, as to not feel that resistance......

I don't like resistance, but I'm trying to think about what is best for those kids and I've now come to the conclusion that they aren't getting all that they need and that I have a prime opportunity to change that.

I can see so many things that could be happening, that aren't, and I've decided to take on that resistance for them.

Maybe, when this is all said and done, I will have left some type of impression upon those children, that school is fun, and that "Ms.Kitchens," truly cared about what they were interested in, and not just their scores on a test.

It's easy to go with the flow, but sometimes, you gotta go against the current..............and just maybe, the water will start flowing the other way or some of the fish will swim with you, making the water easier to tread.


In other avenues, my grandmother appears to be getting sicker and I'm not so sure it's as much physical at this point, as it is emotional.
Almost all of her hair has fallen out now, and she is very embarrassed of it. She doesn't talk as much as she use to and you can just look at her face and see, that her sparkle is dying.She says things like, "if I make it until then." I pray everyday, that God ease her pain and help her to stay on top of this, emotionally and physically. That is all I can do. I am helpless, otherwise. This hurt runs deep and I'm trying with everything that God has placed inside of me to stay strong, but it's hard.........It's hard to see her like this and it's hard to find time. It's hard not to dwell on it and it's hard to focus on what I HAVE TO DO.

I need to uncover my strength, and I need to lean on those people in my life that are my sources.

"Trust in him at all times, O people; pour out your hearts to him, for God is our refuge" Psalms 62:8